Sunday 24 January 2016

THE LAST REPLY


Today my best friend Rhea told me her story, a small part of it though. But it left me with many questions. Questions on the priorities of our lives. The worth of a relationship is best appreciated during hard times. But should the bourgeoisie of the society affect, what we feel for each other? What is more important the society or the relationships?
After months of caging her like an endangered animal in her house, with visitors flooding in to catch a glimpse of her, today she was finally allowed to be a part of the so called civilised society again. She came to college, and we were seated on the same bench in front of the canteen as usual. We are students of the Psychology department of University Of Calcutta. A name known for its heritage across West Bengal and beyond. The sun was about to hide behind the unknown horizon spreading its delectable crimson rays across. A bunch of migratory birds were flying in a straight line across the heart of the evening sky. The tea vendor in the canteen was busy serving tea to a bunch of noisy freshers. And few guys with unknown faces were casting us with questioning glances and releasing puffs of smoke in the air. The eastern part of the country sees the setting sun early besides it was winter, it was mid-January.

Rhea was silent, she was silent throughout the day. When professors and friends had asked her about her health condition, she had answered them with an awkward affirmative nod, meaning she was fine. Her clumsiness had refrained them from shooting a bunch of gossip building questions. I did not ask her anything, I did not believe what the newspapers were buzzing with these days and I just wanted her to be fine. So I brought her to our favourite corner in the campus, hoping to see her brightened face. For a reason completely unknown to me, I was unable to look directly into her eyes throughout the day. But then I did, the dying rays of the setting sun fell on her doleful face, I could clearly see the dark circles and also a small scar on her right cheek, I immediately looked away. After few seconds of uneasiness, I asked her “Care for some tea…hmmm?”And it was the first time during the entire day that our gazes met, “Sure” she said and smiled.

As I was about to walk towards the canteen to get us some tea, she asked me to wait and then accompanied me. In no time, we were perched on our favourite bench again, with tea in clay cups in our hands. This time she started.
“Do you think, I have missed too much Ashima?” she asked.
“Hmmm?” I asked inattentively, only to regain senses in a few milliseconds “Nope…..not really, don’t worry, I will help you!” I smiled lovingly.
“Thanks Ash…ummmm…don’t you want to ask me anything….like the other people…my friends, relatives…all of them wanted to know a lot…but…” she stopped.
“But what Rhea? Do you want to tell me anything?” I asked her.
“Yup…he…he has left me…he” she stammered painfully and looked down. Though I did not see, I could feel the tear drops tickling down her scarred cheek. I could feel my muscles tense and my veins show up on my forehead. Rhea loved Ramanuj immensely, so I could not believe my ears, though my brain had guessed this long back.
“What?” came out of my mouth unintentionally.
“Hmmm, after the September incident he was keeping a distance, I thought he needs time…but little did I know that he lacked backbone to stand up against his irrational, illiterate family members for his physically abused partner….” She stopped when emotions choked her throat. She looked away when I put my hand on her shoulder.
“He did not deserve you” I said what I believed.
“I did not deserve all that happened to me, the dark September night turned my life upside down…lost, defeated I returned only to be shunned from the society, shunned by the person I loved most….Ashima I don’t have anything against those drunken illiterates…..I feel ashamed of the so called literate society around me….it is only a few who really felt my sore….even the closest people were more interested in the spicy details of the incident…” she continued. I wanted to stop her, I did not want my friend to go through that pain all over again. I did not want the poisonous nails to scratch her dignity any further. “Rhea…let it be…try to forget…” I could not complete.
“Forget…huh…never Ashima…never…even if you and I want to eradicate that dark episode off my life…no one will let me do so…I pity mommy and dad…they walk around like ashamed criminals…my aunts, my uncles, cousins and even the media only searched for scoops, tangy, saleable…no one bothered of the pain that evoked deep within me…when they asked me…how many men groped me…how many nasty hands touched my dignity…no one bothers Ash…no one” tears of resentment pent up had found flood gates, and I let them flow. Rhea wept and wept until her lungs gave away. Then she started narrating those details which I refrained from asking, fearing of hurting her, she went into oblivion.

It was 12th September an usual college day for all of us. We had our practical class and were a bit late that evening. Rhea and I had taken the same auto from near our college to M.G. Road Metro station. From there I had taken a metro to Dum Dum and she had taken one to Park Street. The metros had moved in opposite direction as expected. It was 8:00 pm when Rhea reached Park Street Metro Station and was waiting for an auto to take her to her home, where her parents waited for their only child to return. The metro station was unusually empty that evening. Rhea had already started to feel uneasy, when her mobile phone went ablaze with “Baba Calling”, she immediately answered the call. An anxious voice, which she remembers vaguely to be her father’s was constantly yelling desperately “there has been some political party fights near Park Street Metro Station, avoid that area…avoid…avoid”. But before she could realise what was going on, dark shadows of unknown faces were cast on her and rough hands had grabbed her. What followed next, was a never-ending phase of physical abuse, demean and derogation and her meek and futile attempts to save herself. Rhea had no clue, how long she had endured the torture before a bunch of college going boys came to her rescue, followed by the patrolling police. She was immediately taken to the nearby hospital in unconscious condition. Her tormentors had fled and fled for good. Being supporters of some local political party leader, police and administration could not touch them, even with enough witnesses.
Little did my friend know, that her persecution had just started! The media pounded on her, like a hungry wolf in search of tangy scoop. Newspapers, TV channels flooded with the news of a young college girl, being alone in a problem stricken area, late at night and raped by some antisocials, who were supposedly drunk. Questions started to be raised and eyebrows creased. What was she doing in an area, which was under high alert? Why was she alone at that hour of the night (8:00 pm is late night), was she waiting for her lover? Why did she choose to wear western, body hugging clothes (she was wearing a jeans and T-shirt)? An incident which was nothing more than physical abuse and torture, was blown out of proportion to increase viewership and accelerated to appear like rape. Whispers and gossip gave birth to a cacophony of disgrace. Rhea’s parents transformed to cocoons and she a living body without a soul.

She was substantially physically hurt as well and was released from hospital after 10 days of treatment. Doctors advised her to be kept away from anxiety and take rest for atleast a month. Her physical pain started to reduce in due course of time but her mental torment was beyond her abilities to endure. The landline never ceased to ring and her parents never ceased to explain to the unfeeling world, that their ill-fated daughter was not raped. Then started the visits, the relatives and friends who never, ever cared for their existence suddenly appeared from nowhere. As if deprived of sleep and peace, they had come running to enquire of her well-being. Truly, how hypocrite people can be!!! Their only intention was to know the details of the incident and derive sadistic pleasure out of her agony.

However in this incongruity, one phone and one visit was craved by Rhea. Ramanuj! Why was he so cold to all that was happening in her life? He neither called nor visited her after that incident. And as she was under constant scrutiny, she too was unable to contact him. Insecurity and pain was clouding inside her heart. Her brain knew what this coldness meant but her heart defied the truth. “No, Ramanuj loves me…he can never be this heartless…to leave me alone…when I need him the most!” said her heart.

Days, weeks and months passed, she tried contacting him but in vain. Neither her calls were answered nor were her texts replied. She even asked me to contact him, but I was unable to do so. Dark lonely nights witnessed her melancholy as she wiped tears of distress. Her kohl lined questioning eyes, stared at the creaky ceiling fan for hours, “What am I? Who am I? , they asked to the unknown voids that had secretly settled in her life without her consent.

That morning was dark, just like other days. She got up with a bad headache, her right cheek had inflamed again. Probably she had scratched the wound, unaware during sleep. Her eyes were red and fluffy, she must have wept to sleep. Sleepily she walked over to the bathroom to freshen up. The mirror which once looked back at her with a youthful naughty grin and eyes full of life, scared her that day. She looked ghastly, barely a shadow of her true self.

Then suddenly she sprang to life with the ringing of her mobile phone. That was the ringtone she had set for Ramanuj. Her fragile body instantly gathered strength and she ran to answer the call. But alas before she could reply the line was cut. Off late she had stopped stalking him in her dreams, the call had rekindled the diming light. She immediately called back only to hear “the number has been switched off”. So she decided to leave one last message “I don’t know what has distanced you from me, in my knowledge I am not at fault of committing any crime. I had expected your support…your love…but alas I got none. Now what I expect is just a reply…just tell me what you have kept inside….Rhea.” Time ticked off. But Ramanuj did not text back, she kept checking and checking and days passed by. The phone call had revived some hope, but disconnection had started to feel suffocating again.

She wanted to stop herself from checking her phone to see if he had replied. It had been about three days now. She couldn't stop herself despite of trying hard. This sinking feeling to find absolutely no communication from him was killing her
And then the message appeared and swiped her off her feet.

But when she opened it and read it, she nearly stopped breathing. She didn't know if he was joking or not. What was this?
His reply said “I am sorry. But as you must have already understood, this relationship is over. My parents will never be able to accept you, after all this scandal. I cannot blame them, the society is such…take care.”
And this was Rhea’s last reply “Thank you…for letting out yourself. This society is such, because creatures like you and your parents form a part of it. This episode which is a shameful scandal for you and your family…is the hard core and painful reality of my life. Thanks again for sparing my life from your dark presence…you exemplify that literacy cannot make anyone human. Get yourself some life, some light. A relationship that changes status for reasons as you have stated is not worth living. Will never want to see your face again!” The send button was not easy to press but she eventually did. For the next few moments, time came to a standstill as she shrieked out her deepest emotions in the form of painful cries.

The impact of baseless societal norms makes us unfeeling and robs us of basic humanity. The impact of that single incident changed so many lives and so many outlooks.




Aritra Chakrabarty Sengupta



This blog post is inspired by the blogging marathon hosted on IndiBlogger for the launch of the #Fantastico Zica from Tata Motors. You can apply for a test drive of the hatchback Zica today.

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